BIGpedia - Sealab 2021 - Encyclopedia and Dictionary Online

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1 Sealab 2021

Sealab 2021

"Your quest is to find Quinn's ass...then beat it."
"Holy crap! Did you see that freaking chopper explode?"
"Oh there go my nipples again"
"Flashlights, there can be only none!"
"This is Chopper Dave's made for TV Movie 'Blades Of Vengeance',See He's a Chopper Pilot By Day,But by Night he Fights Crime As a Werewolf (uht Uh) YEAH!"
"It makes real cupcakes with a 40-watt bulb. And it has icing packets. but the secret ingredient is love... Dammit!"
"Way to go Sparks, you broke the monitor and you're dead. Happy?"
"Clean out your ears, woman... I said I want some BALLS!"
"How do you like them apples, ho-bag? And how do you like those very same apples, Eggars!?"
"Pod Six is jerks!"
"Punch it, ho-bag!"
"Fignuts"

"Now are you in, or do I have miniature John Wilkes Booth shoot you in the face about a billion more times?"

"Hesh wants married sex!!!"

Murphy: "Nails are like candy to robots. And we'll eat tires instead of licorice."
Debbie: "Gawd! No we won't"
Murphy: "Maybe you won't!"

Debbie: How many times do I get to turn 30?
Quinn: Well according to your drivers license, I'd say 5.
Hesh: "OH DAMN, I know my man didn' jus crawl all up on shawty's grill n put down a flag dat say "BOP, FAH, BIZZIATCH.....ahem"
Debbie: "You tried to sneak Hesh into my party!?"
Sparks: "Nooo, Hesh who?"
Stormy: "Happlewhite."
Sparks(out the side of his mouth): "Shut uuuup."
Stormy: "That's his last name, Happlewhite."
Debbie: "Okay, that friggin' does it, all of you OUT. You too Mr.Look in My Purse(Quinn)!"
Hesh(inside bag): "He was probably looking for his balls!"
Quinn: "Fine! I'm tired of that 35 year old ass anyway!"
Hesh(inside bag): "Aww damn! I guess he found em!"
Sparks: "Well, this has been a lovely evening."
Quinn: "Would you just drive!?"
Sparks: "Thanks for having us!"
Hesh(Still inside bag while driving off with everyone): "Frickin awesome!"

(Long pause)

Sparks: So why don't you call HER Debbie, and the other one...(mockingly quiet)...white Debbie.
Stormy:(guffaws)WHITE Debbie?? (laughs) That's stupid! I know she's white..."
Dr. Quinn: Man, how'd you feel if eveyone went around calling you "White" Stormy?
Stormy:(gasps) You mean there's a BLACK Stormy?!!"
Dr. Quinn: .....No

Debbie: Are you the dying kid?
Griff: I, uh... I, um...
Debbie: You stutter too? Could you have worse luck? Oh well, at least you wont have to deal with it in high school.

Shanks: It was the third of June on the old Tallahachie Bridge. Perseus died first. He made his own bungee jumpin' rig outta a bunch of old bungee cords and duct tape.
Perseus: Watch this, y'all! (jumps off the bridge)
Sparks: Oh man. The rope totally broke, right?
Shanks: Probably woulda, but old Perseus forgot to measure the bridge, so he still had fifty feet of bungee left when he hit.
Stormy: Duuude!
Shanks: And to make matters worse, he jumped holdin' Herc's favorite chicken.
Hercules: Mah chicken!! (jumps off the bridge)
Sparks: No way! Hercules jumped too?
Shanks: Yup. Shattered his spine. But with his last dyin' breath he hollered up to us-
Hercules: Oh man, this ain't even mah chicken!
Odysseus: Well, whose is it?
Hercules: I think you'd better sit down, Ody.
Odysseus: Oh, mah chicken!! (jumps off the bridge)
Shanks: He loved that bird somethin' fierce, but he landed on Herc! Killed 'em both deader than four o'clock in the mornin'.
Sparks: So what happened to the chicken?
Shanks: Funny enough, that old yard bird lived, like a dang miracle... So we ate it.
Sparks: Circle of life, man.
Shanks: Needless to say, Mama was awful tore up about the whole thing.
Mama: Is that Herc's chicken?
Young Shanks: No, it's Ody's.
Mama: ...He's plump.
Sparks: Well, here's to your bean-snappin' mother.
Stormy: And your dead-ass brothers!

(the three drink)

Shanks: That night, Castor and Pollux got to drinkin' and they swore revenge.
Sparks: Revenge? On who?
Shanks: On that damn bridge! They put a fifty gallon tank of gas on either end of the bridge-
Sparks: Wait, they put gas on the bridge?
Shanks: Yeah, shut up. Then, they staggered out onto the middle of the bridge-
Sparks: Wait, the middle of the bridge?
Shanks: Can I tell this, please? Then they pulled back on their mighty bows of ewe, and screamed out-
Pollux (I think): Eh, this is for our brother!
Castor: You son of a bitchin' bridge!
Pollux: Son of a bitchin' bridge made'a wood!
Castor: Goddamn bitchin' burnable son of a bitch!

(The twins launch flaming arrows at the gas, setting the bridge on fire.)

Pollux: Hey, Castor!
Castor: Yeah, Pollux?
Pollux: I am drunk as shiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!! (the bridge falls with Castor and Pollux on it)
Sparks: Wait, you said you had six brothers. That's only five.
Shanks: Yep. Old Achilles died this mornin'
Stormy: How?
Shanks: Heart attack takin' a dump.
Sparks: Circle of life, man.
Stormy: Ashes to ashes, poop to poop.

Family Services Lady: Hi, Family Services...
Murphy: Lady, unless you got a Baby Alvis jammed up your skirt, tell your story walking!